April 11, 2013 – May 9, 2013

I have been wondering how to broach the subject of my surgery on my blog.  Numerous people have asked me what kind of surgery.  I am very open and honest.  I will be entering my 40’s with a little less of me there.  I will be having a full hysterectomy:  the removal of my uterus and ovaries.

During the time leading up to my consultation, I had researched my options and was very certain that this was going to the be the solution.  However, the hours leading up to my appointment, my anxiety started surfacing (and has remained).  The consultation lasted two hours, was very thorough, included a second ultrasound/sonogram, and concluded that this was the only real option for me.

Before leaving the office, I made the first available surgery appointment, as well as the pre-op and post-op appointments.  I am very glad I have opted for the closest surgery date.  I am already obsessing over the surgery, over the recovery with a toddler, and the meaning associated with losing your reproductive organs.

One often hears the topic of the association of the removal of breasts as the removal of “womanhood”.  However, it is undoubtedly the removal of one’s uterus and ovaries that could be considered the quintessential removal of “womanhood”.  That thought has saddened me, even though it is not something that I can see with my own eyes on a daily basis or that has been kind to me (except, of course, for the birth of my son).  Actually, I must pause and say that I am truly blessed to have been able to give birth to Roger and I will never lose sight of that.

I may be losing something physically, but gaining some insight and health for the future.

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