Yesterday I saw my therapist. She is such a busy therapist that I had to book appointments through the end of the year to ensure I would see her every few weeks. Prior to this brilliant scheduling, I was seeing a therapist her office recommended that I could book a future weekly or bi-weekly appointment easily at each appointment. However, I always felt a closer connection to my “other therapist”, so much so that I recommended her to everyone.
The psychologist that I saw for a few months diagnosed me with bipolar disorder due to my reaction to the drug Trazadone. Supposedly, mania while on that medication is an indication of bipolar. However, yesterday, my no longer “other therapist” but my sole therapist, stated that she thinks that is completely incorrect. She has never seen any indication of Bipolar. Instead, she believes I have pretty extreme OCD, depression, social anxiety, and Asperger’s. I agree with her. I never really felt the euphoria of mania.
This past appointment she did say that she has never seen me as energetic/awake as I was at yesterday’s appointment . I told her I was worried it was a manic episode and would culminate in a month-long depression (which started the above conversation). However, she said it appears to be other’s “normal” level of energy that I am finally experiencing since my hormones and medications seem to be stable. Geez, this is how other’s feel daily? I still get depleted by 5 pm but I am actually functional during the day. I’m actually focused and happy/content. I love it and hope it stays this way! In the past, I switched off these hormones due to the pain of injection and the uninsured expense. But, clearly, it is worth both!