After realizing how post after post sounds so dang depressing, I have decided to approach this with a new point of view: Optimism (which is totally unlike me!) and Openness.
I have talked with more people about what is happening in our lives right now and that has seemed to help me quite a bit. I feel like I have been holding onto a secret of some sort and it is such a huge burden to carry. If people cannot handle the truth or would rather not be bothered, then good riddance. I am ready for people in my life who are understanding and open-minded.
This change of attitude has made the days much more fun and easier to deal with. I actually may be a facilitator for a parent support group for ASD. There is none currently available in the area. I have called, inquired, discussed and been told that I sound like I would be interested in facilitating this. Sure. I have tons on my plate, but I can deal with this one more thing. Being that I spend so much time searching for this and would be implementing quite a beneficial group. A discussion with the supervisor next week and the ball may start rolling.
Therapy has begun again after Roger’s illness last week and his interventionist’s illness this week. It is still hard to watch, but I am going to remain optimistic! (or try too….)