May 10, 2012 – Diagnosis: Autism

Today is the day I will always remember:  the day Roger officially got diagnosed with autism.  I gasped when they told us his diagnosis and the “team” was a bit shaken – worried about my reaction.  I immediately felt a lump in my throat and had the feeling like I was going to throw up (which I did first thing when I got home).

I thought knowing the diagnosis would give me peace of mind.  However, it killed my “hope” that he was not autistic.  Secondly, I think we downplayed the whole thing thinking the worst he may be diagnosed with was PPD-NOS.  However, he was firmly diagnosed as having AUTISM.  According to the DSM-IV, you need to meet the following:  2 criteria in social interaction, 1 criteria in communication, and 1 criteria in behavior.  He met 3 of 4 in social interaction (with the 4th being “some” not none), 2 of 4 in communication (with 1 being N/A due to his age and 1 being “some” not none), and 2 of 4 in behavior (with 1 being “some” and 1 being “none”).  That makes it a concrete diagnosis, not a “borderline” diagnosis.

It is funny because when I went over the modules with his Program Manager, I felt he would score worst in behaviors and was more optimistic about the social module.  I guess that is what you get when looking at this subjectively.

This is a lot to digest.  I cannot really express how I feel.  I do not really know how I feel.  All I know is how much I love my husband, my parents, and, most of all, my beautiful son!

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