Fallen off

The past week or so I have fallen off the logging food/eating healthy cycle.  If I don’t log, it usually means I am eating things I’d rather not log!  Also, with the new work schedule and things popping up at Roger’s school, I have missed some of my exercise goals.  I know I cannot be perfect all the time but I know the exercise does help me mentally as well as give me more energy.  You may have realized I was not cycling as much due to the lack of blogging.  Again, I do realize that these posts do help my mind settle down a bit.

I know most people always start their diets back on a Monday.  I hate being that cliché but my husband’s 41st birthday is tomorrow.  That means a delicious dinner tonight.  Tomorrow, drinks and cake will be devoured.  Today and tomorrow I will log my exercise on MyFitnessPal but will go back to strictly logging my food on Monday, cliché and all.

One goal I have met is walking over 10,000 steps every day this week.  YAY for me!  Today I am not confident I will reach that goal since it’s pouring out but will try going up and down the stairs a bunch today.  I do have to clean up the house a bit anyhow.  That should help with my step goal.

Another goal I have been keeping is my squat challenge.  Today was 160 squats.  Tomorrow is the rest day.  I had been planning on resting my body on the squat rest days.  SO, I am not sure I will be on this bike tomorrow or back on it Monday.

Thanks for all the support!

New schedule

With my early morning wake-ups, I decided to ask my job if I could make a schedule change.  And, as always, I sent them my schedule for the following week on Friday.   The big change is starting work at 4 a.m.  I know to the bulk of you that sounds crazy.  However, after last’s week’s early risings, I was starting my work day between 3 and 4.  I am an early morning person and had much more focus and energy working early.  I did not have my afternoon slump at my desk either.

Today I worked from 4-6, got Roger ready for school and had some time together before school, and finished my work day at 11:40 am.  Again, nutso to some, but great for me.  I try to be in bed by 8:45 and get 6 hours of sleep (or more).  This weekend made me realize that over 7 hours is worse for me than only 4 hours of sleep!

I am now riding the bike post-work and, if I ever want to take any exercise classes, I won’t have to make up work time.  These hours will be great for the gym I joined that is opening in November.  By that time, most or all of my physical limitations from surgery should be lifted.

Of course, with upcoming doctor’s appointments and such, the work day will not always be done so early.  BUT I won’t have the worry of when I can make up my work hours or have time to spend one on one with Roger and Rob!

Back on the bike

The previous two days I skipped my stationary bike.  Friday I felt horrible and my legs and body were hurting.  I think I was progressing too far in my workout.  Saturday I had intended to be my full body Day of Rest.  Today I am back on the bike and will be back to the squats (I challenged myself to a 30 day squat challenge).

If I felt bad Friday, mentally I felt awful Saturday.  Uncharacteristically, I got 9 hours of sleep.  When I saw that I was amazed and thrilled.  The rest of me was not.  I was more tired than on days I get a few hours of sleep.  I could not wake up at all. I was in a constant haze. I drank copious amounts of coffee that did not help.  I was in a terrible mood too.  I was depressed, impatient, and very antagonistic.  Those with depression may understand this but when my husband asked me why I was depressed and there was literally no reason that I was depressed but just in that sinking feeling.   However, that answer never seems to be satisfactory.  It is odd I was so down.  I had a denied insurance claim from my surgery since the hospital used some out-of-network providers.  Supposedly that is common, but seeing a “YOU OWE $21,750” EOB a month ago was devastating.  Yesterday, the reprocessed bill was updated on the website and we owe nothing.  That should have put me in a stellar mood.

Well, today I am in a stellar mood on 4.5 hours of sleep.  I am on the bike, blogging, and enjoying the morning. I am super happy that we get to proceed with the new fence that was on hold due to the medical bill above.  Today I know life is good and that those little dips in mood can easily turn around in a day. My body and mind feel rested and ready for this week.

Surgery Insomnia

I’ve always been a light sleeper which makes for a restless night when sleeping with someone else.  And when I complain about Roger waking between 5 and 6 every day despite the time he goes to bed, my mother reminds me that I did the same. “If you were up until 2 am, you still were up by 6.”

Since pregnancy my sleep has worsened.  I used to be a still sleeper – staying asleep on one side all night long.  With pregnancy, I could never get comfortable and my husband’s coming into bed late (the night owl) would wake me too. Once Roger was born, he slept terribly as an infant.  Through his toddler years he would only nap if in constant motion, which meant I had to walk him around in a baby carrier or stroller (if I sat or stopped walking he would immediately wake up) or drive him for an hour or so twice a day.  During ages 2-4, Roger would wake up extremely early in intervals (a week period of 3 am wake ups) and return to the normal 5 am.  And then, a month later, he’d do the 3 am wake ups again.  It was cyclical.  That did not mean he would go down for his one nap any earlier or, on good days, just skip that nap altogether.  Lucky me, his naps ended at 3 years old, as well. On rare occasions, Roger will still have his extremely early morning wake ups and be up for the day.

I wanted to give you a background of my sleep before delving into this “post-surgery insomnia”.  I realize that immediately following surgery, and the first couple of weeks after, sleep is going to be all messed up due to medications and pain.  I think I actually slept better those first few weeks getting the most sleep I have had in years.  However, the past two weeks or so I have had several days of early morning wake ups (being up for the day ranging from 1am to 4 am).

When I returned to work, the insomnia was not the worst thing since I could work instead of drowning in thoughts of “c’mon sleep” and trying techniques to fall back to sleep.  This morning I awoke at 2 and tried my version of counting sheep.  By 2:45 I decided, instead of lying there and doing nothing and being wide awake, I should just get up and start work and hope for a nap later.  BUT before I did that I googled various searches for post-surgery insomnia.  Most articles dealt with the immediate weeks following, but I found an orthopedic surgeon’s website that wrote about the matter:  “Surprisingly, there are no published studies on the frequency of sleep disturbance several weeks or months following joint replacement surgery. However, in one study of patients with broken bones, 41% of patients with shoulder fractures and 36% of patients with knee fractures had difficulty sleeping 3 months after the injury. Even a year later, 20% of patients still reported insomnia.”   I may not have had joint replacement, but I did have cervical disc replacement with a plate and screws.

My husband suggested I add more whimsy to my blog.  With my lack of sleep, I respond, “Well, tough titties”.

Surgery Files: My recovery at home

I was discharged on July 15th after two nights in the hospital.  (That tells you what a big surgery it is since they love to release you right after the recovery room!)  I remember very little of that day except that I stayed in bed the first 24 hours at home, in the dark, without the tv on, or reading books, or looking at my phone.  I could not handle any light.  When I wasn’t sleeping, I was crying over my horrible decision to have had this surgery.  For me the worst part was my throat – I could not swallow ANYTHING.  Everything hurt so much.  I had anxiety over taking medicine and staying hydrated. Drinking water hurt so terribly and I choked continually trying to eat or drink anything.  I started taking pills with applesauce which seemed to be the only substance I could “easily” intake.

On July 16th, I made it downstairs and took my first post-operative shower on my shower chair.  The whole ordeal exhausted me and put me in an utterly foul mood.  I was not very optimistic at this point.  Thankfully, Rob called my neurosurgeon’s office regarding my choking.  They prescribed prednisone and by the end of that pack, I was doing much better.  I was still choking on water but to a lesser degree.

By July 18th, I was turning a corner and not just sitting/lying in bed or sitting in the recliner.  I started walking around the house more.  On the 19th, I took my second shower and it, again, exhausted me.  I think I was overdoing the walking and started feeling not-so-great again on the 20th.

The days and weeks since surgery have had many ups and downs.  Today I am feeling pretty good, but yesterday was a really terrible day where I did not/could not leave the house.  I had to use the shower chair to get dressed after my bath.

Here’s hoping for continued good days and fewer of those bad days!

 

Surgery Files: Remainder of Hospital Stay

The remainder of my hospital stay is pretty fuzzy.  This post will be less story-like and, instead, be a list of what I can recall (since it will not form a complete story).

  • The inability to swallow anything without choking — I was put on a liquid diet.  Things like applesauce I could swallow best.  Drinking items like water were the hardest to get down without constant choking (even on one little sip).
  • Being taught to use the mechanism that tests lung capacity (googled it and found the name to be Spiro-Ball) and my lung capacity was awful.
  • Rob staying the first night in the hospital with me (I remember he did but cannot remember that night at all)
  • Realizing, after being constantly itchy, that I am allergic to morphine (instead of giving me an alternative medicine, they just gave me Benadryl and continued with the morphine drip)
  • Being told I needed to walk more but really doing the bare minimum
  • Not really being taught how to put my brace on and adjust it correctly (or at all for that matter)
  • Switching rooms and trying to reach my parents before their visit.  This ended up in my parents first going to the first room and then having to walk to the opposite side of the floor and my mom falling.
  • My mom refusing to immediately get an x-ray (which the staff probably would have gotten her into ASAP) and instead, after an hour or two, going to ER and being there til 1 in the morning.
  • The nighttime staff being non-attentive the second night when I needed to make my several trips to the bathroom
  • Still being allergic to morphine (so not using it as often as I needed) and given Benadryl.  FINALLLY, before being discharged after the second night in the hospital, they took off the morphine drip and gave me pills: Tylenol 3 and muscle relaxers.  Trying to swallow pills with water was a nightmare.
  • Telling the nurse how I was given the instructions to only take one Tylenol 3 every 8 hours and up to 3 times a day for the muscle relaxer after she told me to repeat the meds in 4 hours.  She could not believe that infrequency.

I do not remember the drive home (although I do remember waiting with the nurse for Rob to drive up).  I do not remember walking upstairs and lying down for the first time.  It is probably best not to remember those things too clearly for I am sure they hurt like hell.

Tomorrow I will try to post about my first week at home (or at least the first full day).

Surgery Files: Day of Surgery

I am going to explain what I remember about my surgery and recovery.  There are definitely really foggy areas, but bear with me.

We arrived at the hospital at 5:30/6 am on Friday, July 13th.  The check-in was the normal process but instead of heading to the back where I have gone through some out-patient procedures, they brought us to the second floor.  I knew I would be spending a minimum of one night for this ACDF procedure (anterior cervical disc fusion) on two levels: C5-C6 and C6-C7.  In layman’s terms, they are taking out those two discs, replacing them, spacing them out as they should be (instead of rubbing on each other and the spinal cord) by putting a plate and screws.  In the process, they move your esophagus and vocal cords to the side.

The enjoyment of the surgery day began with the first nurse trying to put the IV in my right hand.  Once in, she said she lost the vein and was digging inside my hand with that large IV.  I could not hold back tears – so friggin’ painful.  The second nurse comes in and tries to put an IV on the side of my left hand/wrist area.  She sprays something to numb the area and, again, misses.  A third nurse, who looked utterly pissed off because she is probably always called in to do things correctly, quickly inserted the IV into the top of my left hand.  However, by the time the surgeon came in, I was still in tears over the first IV attempt still hurting. The normal paperwork was signed and questions asked and I was rolled back closer to 7:30 than 7 am .

I awoke in the recovery room unable to breathe.  That I do remember.  I was crying trying to breathe.  Rob relayed that rather than the 45 minutes we were told I would be back in recovery, I was there for roughly two hours.  He was not informed of what was occurring but just told the surgery went well and no drain was needed.  At some point, I passed out again and woke in my room.  I saw Rob quickly and, again, upon waking, I could not breathe.  They rushed Rob from the room, took an in-bed X-ray and wheeled me down to get an emergency CT scan.  Thankfully both came back “normal”.  I had to keep oxygen on at all times.  At that point I had not been able to drink anything but given grotesque swabs for my mouth.

Other things I recall from that day:  Carolyn bringing Roger with Get Well balloons to see me (she was so sweet to watch him while I was having surgery).  Rob being utterly sweet and kissing me in the bed.  My parents visit is utterly blurry.  The itchiness of the oxygen up my nose was horrible.  My inability to swallow without choking was horrendous and lasted about a week.  They told me they were putting steroids in my IV.  The nurses wanting me to get up and walk around after the breathing ordeals (yeah, no – to the bathroom and back was fine – and there were many walks to there since I pee a lot).  I remember trying to push the morphine button as often as possible while conscious.  That is about all I remember.

Tomorrow I hope to blog about the rest of my hospital stay.   Thanks for reading!