Let me premise this by saying I have problems.
Thursday night, we went to the library for my son to meet his Reading Comprehension tutor. I was discussing a test he had the previous week and then, OW!. I walk a little further with her and feel an ouchie on my toe. I see this black ant and I try to fling him off casually as we are walking and talking. Eventually, Roger goes into a study room with her and I investigate my foot. Two bites. I didn’t know blank ants bit like this. Rob appears about 10 minutes later and my foot is incredibly itchy. Then I feel something on my other foot — another black ant (or the one I tried getting off my right foot). By now, I feel itchy head to toe and feel like I am covered in ants. I hate that feeling. I could not wait to go home and take a bath. After my bath, I put cortisone cream on my right foot and, once it penetrated, I put socks on. My itchiness would not subside, so I took Benadyrl before bed. The cortisone cream was doing NOTHING.
The next day I awoke with itchy foot and exhausted body. By noon I had drank 4 cups of coffee and was still exhausted. Then, I noticed my throat/windpipe seemed like it was narrowing and my voice became very hoarse. I decided to call my insurance company’s nurse line to see if I should go to the doctor. After extensive questioning and my history of allergies and having experienced anaphylaxis previously, she said I had to go to the doctor. Of course, both my physician’s office and allergist’s office close at 1 pm on Friday. I had to go to RapidMed. Thankfully, the wait was not too long. I ended getting two steroid shots (one in each hip) and prescriptions for 1. more steroids 2. antihistamines 3. a pill for allergic reaction. I had a 4th prescription for epipens but they are backordered at all Walgreens. They have not had them for months.
Before bed I took my prescription antihistamine that did absolutely nothing for the itchiness, I applied more cortisone cream and was incredibly itchy for hours. Finally, I fell asleep and woke up groggy and with the same itchiness.
Today, I started my steroid pack and took the pill for allergic reaction. I am not sure which one is helping but the itchiness has subsided a bit.
Oh, and one last thing, on my internet searches, I found out that there are Black Fire Ants and their bites are just like the Red Fire Ants.
Today has been a slow and steady type of day. I had a nice workflow going, had my “maintenance” allergy shots (which are itching up a storm still), did a teeny bit of straightening around the house, walked with Roger to and from school, and am now stationary bike riding and typing.
The wind picked up on the way home from Roger’s school and I question whether these allergy shots do a damn thing. I still take a Zyrtec and one Benadryl each night and sometimes an allergy pill during the day. I still get congested and sneeze quite a bit — which Rob is concerned with re: cervical fusion/ACDF surgery. And, I still get numerous sinus infections, which the allergist touts does not occur once you get allergy shots. I think it’s been 3 years since I’ve been getting them and the only reason I am not stopping is fear that it may be worse without them. Then I’d have to start from the beginning again and build up my tolerance.
My mother had her follow-up with the orthopedic surgeon regarding her broken pelvis. The bones are healing nicely, but she is in the worst pain of her life. When the doctor did her exam, it was obvious that her intense pain is stemming from her back. She is trying to get a spinal cord stimulator implant to relieve her chronic back pain. She is getting in-home OT and PT. She is such a strong woman! My father has been ceaselessly taking care of her. He is really remarkable, though exhausted, at nearly age 82. We try and go over to visit and when my father needs time away. However, it is hard with our daily work/Roger schedule!
Roger is doing well though he’s starting to complain about being tired much more often. I am thinking he may be affected by seasonal allergies or still adjusting to the time change. He has asked to stop taking Hip Hop Boys. He is still in swimming lessons, School of Rock, Miracle League baseball, and occupational therapy. Maybe that is why he is exhausted!
Robert quit his office job about a month ago and is now working from home as a full-time, independent artist. He has been building up his Instagram followers to over 82,000 and been doing some vendor shows. Next month, we got a booth in the artist’s row at a convention in Dallas. He is making a steady income and much happier. We still have to adjust to having only one car though — I think that may be the hardest adjustment in the weeks to come.
That’s a wrap!
Let me catch you up: Thursday and Friday nights I had terrible allergy attacks at night and, therefore, slept terribly. Yesterday, we still ventured to the St. Paddy’s Day festival in Lewisville but I was in a foul mood. Some of Roger’s behaviors that I may have overlooked on more rested days, I got quite upset about yesterday. So, last night I decided to take Zyrtec-D since it is always a go-to when my sinuses get really bad. However, it’s been a few months and I forgot that horrible side effect it has on me.
I fell asleep around 11 and woke up wide awake at 12:25. I tried for over 3 hours to fall back asleep, even taking melatonin. My last attempt at sleep was counting backwards from 1,000 (which is in a sleep meditation I sometimes listen to). When I could easily count backwards and not get tired, actually be more awake, I realized it was time to get up.
I got up and started working at 3:45 am. I usually only have an hour – 90 minutes of work to do on Sundays. I was worried Roger would wake up and not fall back asleep, but I could not be a prisoner to the bed anymore. Of course, Roger woke a few minutes past 4 calling for me. I told him to either lay in bed and I’d put on the light or lay on the couch outside of the office. He chose the latter but never fell back asleep.
We came downstairs after I was done with work at 5 am. I cleaned up the kitchen some, got the animals’ water dishes refilled, filled up the dishwasher, and sat with Roger while I drank two cups of coffee. Then I started a wash and decided to start riding my bike and blog.
We still plan on going to the Fort Worth Zoo today. I actually think my exhaustion will hit later today or, most likely, in time for work on Monday morning!
It is the Friday of spring break. Unfortunately, it was not quite a break for us. My husband and I had work and my son was in camp all week. Luckily, he was so excited for camp each day and said he had a best friend at camp. Last night, we went to Main Event and played video games and Roger got to play laser tag with a friend from his school. Today, after camp, my husband is taking him to the park and then we will all go to my parent’s place for dinner (bringing over Chinese food). Roger is probably a bit disappointed I did not go to the park, but I woke up with horrible allergies. It’s that time of year when I start having days that feel flu-like but know it is just what happens when the weather is nice. I get to only explore the great outdoors on hundred degree days that are allergy-free. This is truly not fair!
I have decided to have another appointment with the neurosurgeon I met with last year prior to my ulnar nerve surgery (who recommended traction). I have an appointment with him two days before my follow-up with the new neurosurgeon. As you can see, I am really wanting avoid surgery!
I have not received a call from the imaging place yet re: x-rays. I called them yesterday and they did not get the order yet. They said they will call me. So, this afternoon I emailed the neurosurgeon office via the patient portal and will follow up with both over the phone on Monday early afternoon, if I hear nothing.
Now that a couple of days have passed, I feel like the idea of surgery is a long-past memory. I am cheerful, despite allergies. I am loving my new office arrangement and ordered a new, larger turquoise rug (to compliment the orange walls), so I can stretch during breaks.
Tomorrow hopefully my allergies can subside so we can enjoy a day outside in the gorgeous weather. There is a St. Paddy’s Day Texas Style festival in Lewisville I would like to check out. I have also heard the Dallas Arboretum is beautiful. Hope you all have a fabulous weekend!
Achieving balance is what most people are striving for – or at least I am. However, at this time in my life, I view everything as stressful. Work is stressful, cleaning is stressful, trying to find time to exercise is stressful, eating healthy is stressful, getting Roger ready for school/camp/bed/classes/therapy is stressful, playing with Roger is stressful, trying to fall asleep at night is stressful. BUT doing nothing is the most stressful of all for I think of everything I should be doing.
I think I have forgotten how to relax. What is the first step? How do you train yourself to relax? It really pisses me off when I see others relaxing while I am stressing out.
I also think I have forgotten how to have fun. It takes a lot to make me smile or genuinely enjoy myself. It wasn’t until The Dead Milkmen were actually onstage playing that I enjoyed that night.
I genuinely feel bad for my son and my husband. I want to have fun. I want to let go. Will a brain swap work?
Any tips or advice appreciated (just comment).
So, as life would have it, I slept terribly last night. I knew today was jam-packed and I am sure that this is what affected my sleep. I kept telling myself I needed a good night’s rest to make it through today but I ended up restless.
Beside the daily grind of getting Roger ready for school and walking him to school, working at my job, and picking him up for school, the following is scheduled:
- Pain doctor appointment – my lower back stinks today from not getting rest last night (BOO)
- After work, a dental cleaning – I had to reschedule since I had bad allergy attacks the day of my last scheduled cleaning
- Open house at Roger’s school (as well as In-N-Out Burger dinner there)
- The Dead Milkmen concert in Dallas – now this should be so much fun. The last time I saw them I was in high school. I believe it was 29 years ago (GULP) but it will be a late, late night for me.
Barring the doctor’s appointments, it should be a fun day. Roger is excited for Open House and Rob is excited for the Dead Milkmen. I am excited for sleep tonight!
I am still under the weather with coughing, allergies, chills, some tummy issues, etc. Unfortunately, Roger, as an only child, wants to be entertained. This morning he was already talking about what fun things we could do later: karaoke, games. Thankfully, he is aware my back hurt too bad last night from roller skates that he took that off the table. Of course, resting and watching a movie are always off the table for Roger too!
This weekend happens to be a 3 day weekend as well, so that gives me an extra day of “fun” to schedule for Roger. I am trying to institute a family fun day on Saturdays to do something out of the ordinary (zoo, museum, Dallas in general, etc.). Tomorrow, I am pitching Ripley’s Believe It or Not since it will be quite chilly. We will see if everyone is on board with that decision. Sunday, I hope to feel up to Yin Yoga and Mediation followed by a short date with Rob. Monday morning is still unscheduled but I have a make-up swim lesson planned for 1 pm followed by a play date with Roger’s best friend followed by Occupational Therapy.
I just have to make it through today first!